Here at Green Point Christian College, we believe that healthy families are the cornerstone of a flourishing society. However, we all know that parenting can be challenging at times, and we need as many tools in our toolbox as we can get. Over the next few weeks, I will share some different resources and ideas that might support the parenting process. This week I wanted to share a principle called F.A.C.E, derived from the field of interpersonal neurobiology (IPNB). This principle focuses on fostering healthy, resilient relationships and emotional regulation in children by understanding and applying four key components: Flexible, Adaptive, Coherent, and Energised.

Flexible: Flexibility in parenting means being open to change and responsive to your child's needs as they evolve. It involves adjusting your parenting style as your child grows, recognising that what works for a toddler might not be suitable for a teenager. Flexibility also encompasses the ability to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations, which models effective emotional regulation for your child.

Adaptive: Adaptability is crucial in helping your child cope with life's inevitable changes and stresses. By demonstrating adaptive behaviour, parents show their children how to adjust to new circumstances healthily. This might mean altering routines to better fit your child’s emotional and developmental needs or being open to new strategies when old ones no longer work. An adaptive parent is one who listens and responds empathetically, fostering a secure and supportive environment.

Coherent: Coherence in parenting refers to maintaining a consistent and clear approach to rules, expectations, and communication. When parents provide a coherent environment, children feel more secure and understand what is expected of them. This stability helps children develop a sense of predictability and trust, essential for emotional and psychological well-being. Coherence also involves parents being authentic and genuine, allowing children to see and understand true emotions and behaviours.

Energised: An energised parent is one who is engaged, enthusiastic, and positive in their interactions with their child. This doesn’t mean being relentlessly cheerful but rather showing a genuine interest and involvement in your child's life. Energised parenting can significantly impact a child's motivation and passion for learning and exploring the world around them. It also means taking care of your own well-being to ensure you have the energy to support and nurture your child effectively.

By considering the F.A.C.E principles, parents can reflect on ways to create a nurturing environment that promotes emotional health and resilience. Flexibility, adaptability, coherence, and energy in parenting not only help in dealing with day-to-day challenges but also contribute to the long-term psychological development and well-being of children.

Joel van Bentum
Principal