Technology and Social Media

One of the ubiquitous and continually exploding elements of our current society is social media. These digital spaces have reshaped the way our society functions and how we all interact with one another, and it is having a huge impact on, well, everyone. From children to teens to adults to our parents, social media has intruded into our lives and as a culture we are only just beginning to understand the leading edge of the impact of that. 

All social media is carefully designed and shaped by its creators. It is designed to meet the goal of the company creators which is ultimately to maximise their profit. They do this by seeking to maximise a person’s engagement and they do this by hacking our brain chemistry. We are learning more and more that our young people are quite susceptible to this brain hacking and there are multiple issues that are being driven by this dopamine hijack.

The makers and masters of this technology are very aware of this issue. The evidence of this is in the way they are seeking to raise and manage their own children. Most Tech mogul families seek to be technology free. A 2018 New York Times article outlined the extreme technology free contracts they were required to sign. The makers of this technology do not want their children on the technology.

So how can we manage this. In most family homes, including my own, technology has at different times been a battle zone. The well-worn statement of “all the other parents let…” flows from the mouths of our children. It can make us as parents feel very alone and like we have no support in the technology battle.

What I have learnt over time and as a Principal speaking to so many parents is, ”all the other parents don’t let…”. Most parents are having the same conversations, putting in very similar boundaries and working as hard as you to put good and reasonable limits around technology use. They are seeking to minimise the brain hacking elements and seeking to maximise the good elements of technology. My encouragement here is to speak directly to other parents. Get the lowdown from them and not from your children. You might be surprised as to the similarities.

Issues around social media now represent one of the fastest growing areas of issues that we as a College need to deal with, so let me share some of the tips I have learnt over the years, often the hard way.

1. Nothing is private on the internet – Make this a refrain.
2. Be the parent – Be proactive and considered about the family rules and talk about them regularly.
3. You might need to change first – Sometimes we need to look at our own habits and behaviours, be honest about your own struggles with your kids.
4. No Technology in bedrooms, ever. This battle is worth the fight, new technology naturally draws users into private and secret spaces.
5. Have limits on use – The E safety commissioner has some helpful guidelines on technology use limits. https://www.esafety.gov.au/parents/issues-and-advice/screen-time
6. Do not let your children have a social media account till they are allowed to. Each company has created a minimum age for use. Doing this also saves you an argument. The current limits for all major social media platforms is13-years and there is currently a push to raise these limits. So, I encourage you to be free to set your own family limit and to stick to it. Snapchat had a 16-year limit in our house and now that my children are young adults they have thanked us for holding that line.

The technology battle is real and ongoing. However, you are not alone and as a community we can work together to support our young people to be able to use technology and social media safely and well.

Joel van Bentum
Principal